Ten Minutes

10 Minutes. I can't even imagine having 10 minutes all to myself.
What would I do? Where would I go? What insanity could I get up to?
Realistically, I'm aware that 10 minutes isn't that big an expanse of
time. But the idea of having 10 minutes of peace is almost enough to
make me giddy.

Right now, I feel like everything is scheduled to a minute, even my
free time. During the day, my time is taken up with Little Guy and
prepping for the evening. If it's a class night, I am getting things
arranged and making sure I have everything I need. If it's not a
class night, I am either preparing for the next class or getting the
stuff done that can't get done on nights that I teach.

I enjoy teaching and I definitely enjoy being a parent, but it really
leaves you little in the way of downtime. I acheive much by
multi-tasking. The more I can get done at once, the bigger the
potential for free time. Though, Free time is a misnomer. There's
always something that needs to be done. Though, if I had 10 minutes
of free time, I would sit. Just sit and enjoy the peace and quiet.

There's very little in the way of peace and quiet, especially with our
Little Guy. Currently, he's all over me trying to read what I'm
writing as I write it. My typing time is filled with: "What word is
that mommy? What are you writing?" Once we finally get him to settle
down, it's time for Big Guy and I to go to bed as well. Then, I take
advantage of his sleep time the next day to cram in writing that I
need to get done.

I really can't imagine my life any other way. I love the busyness our
Little Guy brings to our lives because, for the most part, he is a
delightful and cheerful child. He's remarkably smart and remarkably
quick and also remarkably busy. With the weather the way it is, I've
been trying to take him outside in between rainy bouts. He needs the
outdoor time to release some of that energy.

I wish there was some way to harness and bottle that energy. We might
actually turn a profit off his seemingly limitless amount!

Finding peace in upheaval

I wouldn't even know where to begin in discussing the insanity of the past couple weeks. We had a roommate, but now we don't. We were going to move, but now we aren't. Plus ca change, plus c'est la meme chose! We're back to the three of us living in the house and still planning on moving. The commune idea is, unfortunately, dormant for now. I'm still trying to figure out what happened and why and kind of relieved I don't have to deal with anyone else's flakiness any more.  Flakiness is good in biscuits, not friendships!

I'm still trying to figure out how I feel about the situation, but that's mostly due to things happening so fast that I'm still not sure what happened. As far as I know, it wasn't a big blow-out, which is good. There are things that concern me, but, as Big Guy told me when this happened, there's nothing I can do and it's not really my place to say anything.

We had also found a perfect place that would have worked wonderfully, but then things shifted right in the middle of trying to get it which led to lots of acrobatics on Big Guy's and my parts trying to get things all sorted out. In the middle of doing that, the place got rented out from under us. I'm irked about the acrobatics it required (which should have been completely unnecessary) but not horribly upset. It's back to the drawing board in terms of houses but we know what we want and we know what we can do. We've also decided that if we do try the commune idea again, we're going to start it on our own and let other people join. That way it doesn't matter if it takes off or not, we're still settled.

So, I've been practicing centering myself and finding silver linings along with looking for a new place to live. And I'll add to that, trying not to be concerned for our former roommate. Big Guy and I have already discussed how to handle this and we're in complete agreement. I just hope that our plans for the worst case scenario don't come to fruition. Someday, I may be able to talk to him about all of this, but I don't think that day has arrived and, hopefully, it will be a long way in the future. I'd rather be wrong in this case than right.

I finished the Song of Ice and Fire books and loved them... Right up to the end of A Feast For Crows. A Dance With Dragons has been in the works for 5+ years and GRRM shows no signs of finishing it. Little Guy has been reading up a storm and making up stories about everything. His latest stories have involved people and things from a couple animes we watched, The Last Exile and Avatar: The Last Airbender. Combined with Fat Princess, his stories involve swordfighting, flying and firebending. Between that and begging me to watch Monty Python, I love this kid.

Little Guy is Spirited not Strong-willed

I'm confining myself to the same strictures I put on my students and forcing myself to sit and write for 10 minutes straight.  Well, at least as straight as a parent who is home with a 4 year old can make it.  Right now, I'm up to about a minute of uninterrupted time.  I'm seriously impressed. 

Currently, Little Guy is ensconced in the hall with his cars.  I can't get him to finish his "brep-fast" of a banana on a hot dog bun smeared with peanut butter.  He asked for it and now he won't eat it.  Meals have become a battle ground.  Short of forcing him to sit, we're stuck with fighting him every step of the way to eat.  This has become the new "potty" argument. 

One of the things I have done recently is look up advice on "Strong willed" children.  I immediately decided I didn't approve of the group who had take "strong willed" as their banner phrase and instead decided to go with the parents of spirited children.  It may not seem to make sense, but I've discovered the advice on parenting "strong willed" children seems to advocate breaking their spirit and bending them to the parent's will.  Advice on parenting "spirited" children seems to advocate working with the spirited child and encouraging them to keep their sense of self while working within the bounds of society. 

I don't want to break his spirit or individuality.  He's going to need it as he gets older.  I want him to be able to make his own decisions and to be firm in his convictions.  I want him to not be afraid to stand up for the right thing, even if most people disagree with him.  I don't think that forcing him to follow a narrow path is the best way to do that.  Of course, I also have issues with society as a whole right now. I don't want him to follow the path that so many people seem to follow and be apathetic and content with the status quo. 

I think spirited children are our future and quite likely our only hope.  If we're so keen to make them fit into the cubby holes that society has deemed appropriate, we will never improve the situation in our country.  If Edison or Lincoln had done that which was expected of them, we would still be enslaving people by candlelight.  And, unfortunately, he has me for a mother.  I hate following the well-worn paths.  I'd much rather poke around and discover what I can find on my own.  I want him to feel comfortable doing that too. 

What this means for me, however, is a long period of time where I will be frustrated and irritated because my son has a mind of his own.  I just have to let him learn some things through trial and error.  Right now, we're not going to go outside because he hasn't finished breakfast.  Once he finishes breakfast, I will go out with him and turn on the sprinkler and let him play to his heart's content.  But he's being his spirited self and I suspect that won't happen before I have to get ready for work. 

Summer came in like a freaking Lion

Summer has come to Indiana unexpectedly.  Two weeks ago, we were fretting over frost advisories and today it's supposed to be in the upper 80's.  Sadly, this is common for Spring.  In April and May we have an equal chance of building a snowman or going swimming.  But eventually we will settle into the super-hot temps of summer and I'll complain that I wish it was cooler. 

On Mother's Day, we went out to my mom's house to go shooting with the rifle and had to wear warm clothes.  We went back this past weekend and we were sweating like crazy.  Shooting is fun, though my shoulder hurts for a day or two afterwords.  On Sunday night, I was sitting in my chair and I stretched and I heard a maswsive crack as the bones in my shoulder rearranged themselves.  I could actually feel the shift.  It was rather disconcerting. 

The arrival of summer also means that it's time to spend more time with Little Guy outside.  At some point today we are going to go outside and play in the sprinkler.  He loves the sprinkler and I love watching him play.  Right now, he's becoming such a little boy.  The baby aspects are disappearing and he's developing a little boy body and little boy legs.  I find myself looking at him and wondering where the baby went. 

Though watching him play as a little boy provides hours of amusement too.  Yesterday, Big Guy took him to the park while I was working.  Little Guy decided he had to pee and went to a corner of the playground, dropped trou, and peed.  Big Guy said the first clue he had that Little Guy was doing something he oughten't was a fellow park parent shouting: "He's peeing!  He's peeing!"  So.... We can never show our faces there again.  Of course, while we were regaling Whiteybare and his girlfriend with this story outside lst night, Little Guy went over to the lot next to us and started peeing again.  

 

"What are you doing?!" I shouted. 

"I'm peeing all over the place!" Little Guy shouted back with a grin.

I think he's definitely his father's child.